Eminem – “I’m Having A Relapse”
“Hand me that eighteen-month-old baby to shake him up/ It’ll only take me a second to choke his trachea
Breaking his neck in eighty-some places baby, here Shady comes, lady/ He’s got the razor b-blades and the ch-ch-chainsa-saw, baby/ You b-b-blundering, bumbling, m-m-mumbling dum-dums/ Yeah, here I come-come, you hear the rumbling vrumm-vrumm?/ There’s something inside of that blue tub and that drum, drum/ A head and torso of someone, where’d it come from?/ Who’s it belong to? Maybe the girl with the long, blonde/ Hair who disappeared and left her cheerleader pom-poms/ Clearly there’s somethin’ wrong, cause she didn’t come home
She’s missing, where is she? Something fishy is going on/ I guess he stuck the b*tch with the pitchfork with the long prongs/ Now everybody get your dance on to my damn song, come on…”
You didn’t think we’d leave Marshall out, did you? Although this one has only one expletive, your rents may give you cold stares for Christmas, your birthday, and Easter for the rest of your adult life after this one-two punch. First, Marshall cruelly ends the life of an 18 month old baby and then Shady, courtesy of the drugs/pills/mental illness, brings the sickness with razor blades and a chainsaw. But there’s a reference to Natalee Holloway left in pieces inside a blue tub. So not only will your pregnant cousin Katherine be traumatized at the thought of her unborn child dying at the hands of a madman, her dad, uncle Bob, will relive following the Holloway case all over again. Good luck trying to get anyone dancing to this one.
-Bryan
