Move along cops, nothing to see here
John Balmer is a 50-year old man that lives in Florida and was found shopping in K-Mart, but it’s his third crime that we’re here to discuss. While walking around the department store in a “Who needs drugs? No, really, I have drugs” t-shirt, Balmer was arrested for drug possession. Yes, 2015 is being this good to us already.
According to the Tampa Bay Times, which obtained the arrest report according to a Concourse story, the man was standing in line at K-Mart when he tried to ditch the drugs he had on him–marijuana and methamphetamine–when a cop walked in. Paranoid, much? He allegedly tried to hand over a bag of “leafy green substance” to a patron standing behind him. The patron denied Balmer’s “request.”
Balmer then tried to escape by tossing the bag to the ground and casually paying for his items, but he didn’t get too far. K-Mart employees eventually told authorities about Balmer’s rather illegal contribution to the store’s floor, and he was arrested shortly after.
